Lost in the Night
by chaneldancegrl
Summary: Spoilers for Clockwork Prince. Will's still not over Tessa, but can he get over that in time to be Jem's best man at the wedding? And what happens when the wedding goes terribly, terribly wrong? Spoilers for Clockwork Prince. Features Will/Tessa, Tessa/Jem


** Lost in the Night**

**Summary: Will's still not over Tessa, but can he get over that in time to be Jem's best man at the wedding? And what happens when the wedding goes terribly, terribly wrong? Spoilers for Clockwork Prince.**

A/N: This is for one of my close friends, Janelle or intrajanelle on tumblr, who loves The Infernal Devices and got me hooked on the series and TMI series too (though I just started reading those). I don't know if this is exactly what you wanted, it got a little bit darker than I thought it would be. There's Will/Tessa but not as much as I thought there'd be. I honestly have no idea where this story went, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

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Will Herondale looked up as the two grand doors in the back of the room swung open and the pianist began playing, announcing the arrival of Tessa being led down the aisle by Henry. The small congregation stood and turned to look; the couple had decided to keep their wedding a private affair, limited to their friends at the Institute and some others were close enough friends. Everyone had their eyes on the bride, as she slowly made her way down aisle. Tessa raised her own, meeting a pair at the end of altar. Will tore his eyes away from the sight of her, her with her gold dress flowing gracefull around her, her hair pulled away into an intricate bun with some spirals gently framing her face, and a glowing smile. To his right, he saw his best friend, his parabati, Jem, dressed in ivory and wearing this look of complete love and adoration as he gazed at Tessa.

Will felt his heart swell with happiness for Jem. Jem, who had put up with all of Will's insults and hurtful actions, fought side by side with him, and who had continued his Nephilim duties despite his illness and addiction. Now, Jem had finally found someone to love, someone he was able to be completely open with besides Will. And Will was completely glad for his friend, but as he looked back at Tessa, he felt his heart drop at idea of losing her. He felt a pang in chest from all the missed opportunities, all the hurtful things he had done to push her away; no longer could he sneak off with her to infiltrate parties, feel her soft lips against his, or hold her inappropriately close without saving her from death. Of course they could still talk and share their favorite poetry and books, but now their encounters would be filled with awkwardness. Surely, Tessa knew that his feelings for her wouldn't go away, and he would feel incredibly guilty about missing her and thinking about her when she was married to Jem.

Will held back a sigh and turned to look at Tessa. Suddenly, her gaze flickered from Jem to Will and her smile faltered slightly. She turned her stare back to Jem, but her smile didn't seem quite as radiant. A murmur went through the crowd when Tessa tripped on her dress suddenly, and stopped. Again, she looked to Will and straightened, but hesitated, looking at Jem's slightly confused expression. The pianist played on, but stopped when Tessa made no move to continue.

"I-I ca-" Abruptly, she was cut off by a whirring sound surrounding the building. Everyone in the room stiffened. Then, flying machines and clockwork automatons burst through the open doors and windows, causing destruction. It wasn't long before the Nephilim pulled out their disguised weapons and returned the attack. Chaos ruled the room as the wedding party fought and slashed at their enemies, only to have the fallen be immediately replaced. Jem used his staff to dig into the back of enemies' heads, trying to dislodge their wiring. Henry pulled some small gadgets out of his pocket and attached them to his opponent's heads, causing them to short circuit and crumple to the ground. Will pulled out some daggers he had hidden, and used them for hand to hand combat, finding the human look-a-like machines easier to face than the monstrosity they faced in the warehouse earlier against Nathaniel Gray. He caught a glimpse of Tessa, using a fallen scythe to fight back. Although she fought valiantly due to her previous training, she was being herded into a corner and in danger of being overwhelmed.

Will called to Jem and together they began to move toward Tessa, but it was a difficult process because they lacked their usual fluidity and compatibility; something was off between them. Will couldn't understand why, but just kept pushing harder.

An explosion near Tessa shook the room and caused a gaping hole in the wall. Will and Jem blinked the dust out of their eyes, taking in the scene. It had blasted several of the machines to bits, and Tessa lay fallen on the floor, her hair and golden dress a tattered mess. Another of the huge machines had burst through the wall, its long metallic arm reaching for Tessa. "Tessa!" Jem and Will both shouted and tried to run to her, but were held back many more automatons. The larger machine had picked her up and began moving back outside.

More Nephilim came to their aid, taking down the last of the automatons. Will and Jem were the first to follow the huge contraption, Henry, Charlotte, and Gideon not far behind. It wasn't hard to find the monstrosity, as it was making its down the busy London street, leaving carnage in its path. They followed it to the Thames River, where they saw Mortimer on the other side, smiling devilishly.

"Have you boys not yet learned your efforts are futile? Children these days, so naïve and bull headed."

"Not a chance," Will spit out.

For some reason, the machine had halted, causing everyone to look at it with confused expressions, including Mortimer. "What in devil's blazes are you doing?" he shouted at it.

A familiar blue demon, climbed out of the back of the contraption's head, across its shoulders, down its arm, and stood above a Tessa that was slowly regaining consciousness.

"What are you doing? Put me down!" She struggled uselessly against the metal trap.

Will recognized the demon and felt his face grow as pale as Jem's . "You- but I thought you were dead."

"Technically speaking young boy," the demon smiled slowly, his razor teeth showing and his sharp tail flicking in the air. "I'm just here to fulfill my promise." Quickly, his tail shot through the air, faster than Jem's staff or Will's knife, piercing Tessa in the heart. When both weapons hit him, he fell and burst into ashes. The machine, its final mechanics failing, loosened his grip and let Tessa's body fall to the ground. Will caught her first, holding her in her arms. Unlike his sister Ella, Tessa's death was instant, but he still felt the overwhelming guilt for having caused this and for not being able to save her. He felt Jem's presence beside him, but couldn't focus on him, instead just hoping and praying that the girl in his arms would wake up. He saw Jem grab her hand tightly. Will felt tears, begin to run down his face, but he wasn't ashamed to reveal his feelings. He just wanted to hold Tessa, the girl he loved more than anyone in the world forever, so that he wouldn't leave her again. He paused in his own anguish, and remembered the other person he loved so much in the world, Jem, who was practically his brother. Jem, the boy who was just about to marry the girl whose lifeless body Will was holding in his arms. Jem's fiancé who had hesitated in the middle of the aisle. Will raised his eyes to his parabati and noticed Jem was lying on the ground near them, hand still tightly gripping Tessa's, but who' s soul was just as gone from this world as hers.

Will felt his heart stopped, and he cried out, reaching for Jem.

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Will sprung up, breathing hard as he took in the familiar surroundings of his dark room. _A dream, it was just a dream. _He wiped the sweat from his face_. A terrible nightmare. _Will lay back down in bed, trying to sleep, but his body was still used to being awake all night and walking around town. And if he was honest with himself, he knew he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep if his earlier dream was likely to restart.

In a couple of minutes, Will found himself opening the doors to the library, hoping reading one of his favorite poets by candlelight would tire him out for the night or calm his head. Instead, he caught Tessa doing that exact thing. He started to back out, but she took that moment to look up. "Will. What are you doing here?"

He came back in, shrugging. "Just doing my routine inspection of all the rooms. I know you are one of the library's best patrons, but you are the owner."

She ignored the jab. " You felt that was necessary in the middle of the night?"

"Of course. That's when all the worst monsters come out to play. And after Charlotte tightened control on the Institute, I haven't been able to go on my nightly walks." He shook his head sadly. "Just think of all the broken hearts I've left behind."

Tessa rolled her eyes. "You don't have to keep pretending anymore. I always knew you never did anything outrageous on those nights."

"Well, aren't you the detective? You didn't even have to ask me." Will smirked and walked over to her. "Why are you still awake?"

Tessa sighed and rubbed her eyes. "I don't know. I couldn't sleep well."

"You know, I've heard that the life of a bride to be is quite hectic," Will joked, trying to get around the awkwardness.

Tessa sat in silence, fidgeting with the engagement ring on her neck.

"Tessa?" Will prodded, growing wary by her lack of response. "Is everything alright?" He became confused. Jem would never do anything to hurt her, he couldn't understand her hesitance. Was it merely common pre-marriage jitters? He shook the thought away; they seemed happy together and the wedding wasn't for a couple months since there were still arguments about Tessa's race._ Unless she has conflicting feelings about… No_. Will shoved that destructive thought away.

"Jem's a gentleman," she said finally. "I know he would never lie to me or try to hurt me. He's completely loyal." Will simply nodded, encouraging her to continue. "But I can't help but feel- I'm sure he doesn't mean any harm by it, but… I worry that he is…quite taken with Cecily."

Will started, and he tried to form words. "You believe… that Jem, our Jem, fancies… my sister?" He began to shake his head quickly, ready to object, but when he reflected on their interactions, he paused. Truthfully, Will had noticed Jem's attention to Cecily: he put up with her sarcastic remarks and head strong attitude, helped show her around the Institute, gave her extra advice while she was training, and smiled at her when she entered the room (not as much as when it was Tessa, but more than almost anyone else). Still, this was _Jem_. "I can see why you would think that, but Jem loves you. I've never seen him look happier than when he is with you. If he cares for my sister at all, and I don't know why he would with her stubborn personality and sharp remarks, it is merely friendship. He hasn't given me any reason to believe otherwise," reassured Will.

"Did you know he loved me _before_ I told you?" challenged Tessa, causing Will to cringe slightly at the memory, his confession, his shock, and her rejection.

"No," he recovered. "I was too caught up in my own… distractions." He sat on the desk, gazing at her. "But I'm here _now_. Jem's just being kind. We'll both always be there for you."

They sat in silence for a while, just holding each other's gaze, trying to read the hidden messages passing back and forth between them. Finally, Tessa spoke. "Will, please don't-"

"Tessa, I know you don't return my feelings for me. You really don't have to reiterate them, thank you very much, but that doesn't mean I'm going to become cruel or indifferent to you. I don't want to keep pushing you away."

"How do you know that I feel? You have no idea what runs through my mind."

Will glanced at her, catching the implication. "Not always. Sometimes I haven't the slightest clue what you think, but other times you are as open as the many books you read. Now, do you have something you'd like to share with the congregation?" He spread his arms out wide to their invisible audience.

Tessa's gaze hardened and she quickly stood up. "I should go." She started to leave the room, but Will quickly stepped in her path, teasing gone from his demeanor.

"Tessa," his voice caught on her name, "I have to know."

She hesitated. "It's too late, Will. I'm sorry."

"But what if I wasn't? What if, what if I had reached you earlier, or if I had known the curse was a lie? What would've happened?"

"Will, please."

He continued on desperately, not caring how distressed or irrational he sounded, "I wouldn't have pushed you away all those times; I would've worked harder to win your affections. You wouldn't have hated me for all the horrible things I thought I had to do. I just can't lose you." He thought of his previous dream, of holding her cold lifeless body in his arms, and blanched.

"Will! Just stop!" she cried out, ending his rambling. She took a breath, before softly saying, "You're not a monster, Will. You've said cruel things to me, but I feel we've been able to get around some of that. The problem is… you are just so confusing. I don't know how to react around you sometimes."

"What if things had been different?" he pressed.

She sighed, looking at Will with conflicting emotions that he struggled to understand. "But they're not. You can't go back and change what's been done. You maybe a Nephilim, but you are not a time traveler." Her resolve hardened. "And I'm not going to tear you and Jem apart with my answer. You say you can't lose me, but neither could you bear to lose Jem. I won't make you choose, because you could risk losing us both." Tessa picked up the novel she was reading and walked past Will who was lost in his thoughts.

When she got to the door and turned to bid farewell, she caught his piercing blue gaze, understanding reaching his eyes. "Good night, Will," she murmured.

He nodded, and she felt his eyes on her as she walked into the dark corridors, praying she could remain steadfast to her promise, despite the increased beating pace of her heart.


End file.
